On a recent zoom call, as we discussed dream careers, I was surprised to hear my colleague say he wanted to play professional soccer. His voice lit up as he spoke of his soccer days. When asked what changed his mind, he said, “We had a coach who was pretty competitive. He took the fun out of the game. Most players were burnt and dropped out that season”. Listening to him speak brought back memories of days when I ran out of the office, “Hey, I can’t do a 4.30 today; I have to head out for a soccer game.” My colleagues heard this repeatedly for over a decade. Sometimes, I had to remind myself – it was not I, but my two teenage daughters who were the soccer players. However, after spending hours every week driving, watching, cheering – I literally felt I was no less than a player. Our soccer journey had grown from recreational play to local competitive teams and finally travel soccer.
As the girls climbed the soccer ladder, the more competitive the teams got – this was to be expected. They wanted to be challenged, right? What was more interesting was the concept of a team A and team B on most club teams. Invariably on each club, Team A is the” better” team while Team B is a “feeder” team for Team A. Come fall and the start of a new soccer season, Team B struggled to recruit new players to fill its roster; with a new team, team B invariably lost games due to lack of alignment and communication amongst players. As the season went by, there were multiple team bonding events. Parents got to know each other; girls gelled and learned each other’s playing styles and moves, partnerships were formed. Travel games started to be more fun. Come spring, the girls played so much better as a team. And by the time the soccer year wrapped up, the girls had aced it! There were some big wins and high fives before teams took a break for summer. They practiced over summer and come fall, it was the start of another soccer season. The club pulled the “good” players from team B players to team A. And the ritual started all over again.
For team A, they too struggled a bit at the start of a new season, but not as much as team B as they had practiced with some team B players. Team A generally lost players to competitive teams and some players dropped out. The new players worked to break through team cliques to be accepted. And in two to three months, the play started to even out.
I watched this cycle repeat over and over again over many years: Low morale of team B players, the entitlement of team A players, lack of player engagement, and players dropping off the sport altogether.
Another thing I noticed was different coaching styles. One particular coach stands out in my mind. Willy. Willy held several practices a week. He was tough and fair. He held you accountable – both to improve your individual skills as well as your team game. He coached you on your strengths. During practices, he was on the field with the girls, having them repeat certain moves and plays; every incorrect move resulted in five to ten pushups. Come game time, he watched silently from the sidelines. He encouraged and provided feedback to each player as they walked off the field. But on the field, the players were on their own.
Gallup study shows that employees want coaches and not bosses. Employees value managers who can coach them, who value them as both people and employees, and who help them understand and build their strengths and skillsets. This is more important than ever, especially during the pandemic as employees juggle jobs, children, and caregiving needs. As we build strategies to engage and support our teams and drive business, here are some key points to keep in mind:
- We need strategies to develop both, the individual player as well as the team. When we focus on one, we lose out on the other.
- Team A vs Team B philosophy is demoralizing and not forward-thinking. With a short term goal to make it to team A, the players are not taught to set long term goals for growth. Their only goal is to make it to team A, and once they make it to team A, you lose the player altogether.
- With a split team approach, team spirit is low or almost negligible. A player’s personal performance is limited to the individual win and not a beautiful choreographed game where each player involved plays to their best – very much like an agile team. You pass the ball when tackled by a defender from the opposite team. You let your open teammate closer to the goal score, taking your team to victory.
- As we develop players, remember, each player has a different purpose. Work to understand what motivates and engages them. Refrain from coaching with the assumption that everyone plays for the same purpose.
- And yes, most important of all, coach your players on the sidelines. When they are on the field, let them own their game.
In high school, both my daughters dropped out of travel soccer and decided to play only on their high school teams. They said it was no longer fun. They were tired of conflicts and broken teams. I wonder if they too, like my colleague, will think and yearn for that level of play. But, on the other hand, their decision opened my schedule for plenty of 5 pm meetings.